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Hard UwU

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Views: 20.646

Cashier: the usual? 5 liters of beer? Me: juice. Cashier:

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IQ test

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Take off your underwear if it's dry Me:

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Nice two Just hit the paws 🥊

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Did you say family?

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Her: will you have some gum? Me: Give me two, like in the commercials She: what commercial?

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When you broke up and everything reminds you of him.

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Boy: I can't be with you, you're a difficult character Man:

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When she says you don't have to spit out food, you have to swallow it. That's when I:

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Engineering genius

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A good sniper takes spent shell casings out of position

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Brakes failed, but there's a quadrober on the road

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My wife calls and dictates an address for me to pick her up from karaoke

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When people ask me how I got my bruises

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Decided to do a good deed and walk a strange girl home, and for some reason she runs

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Quadroblers in 50 years

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Views: 12.887

I love doing surprises for my family Dinner at home or dinner out

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Views: 4.062

Driving down the highway Mosquitoes against the windshield

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Views: 8.104

Moment

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Life tip number one

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Views: 21.342

Every kid wants a Spider-Man costume

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Views: 27.600

High degree of protection

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When he asked me to surprise him in the bathroom

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Hostess

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